ALLS 'WELLS' THAT ENDS WELL

Medical Report for Tunbridge Wells 2nds vs Blackheath Ladies 1st XI, Saturday 17th Oct 2015

Presenting complaint: One defender missing in action – last seen heading over the border for a dogging weekend (surprisingly it was not Vicky!) and one missing skirt.

History : 3 wins out of 4 so far

Examination :
A sandy, slow autumnal pitch
Several bloody knees from forwards diving around the pitch in pursuit of goals
One impressive split lip leaving 3 units of blood on the pitch

Overall: Blackheath started well and looked dangerous. Netty had a consultation with the 3rd umpire on the side-lines, about the wrong end of the pitch. Midway through the first half, a clinical Jilly special broke the deadlock. However Blackheath then lost some intensity, and with some hospital passes, let Tunbridge Wells back in the game.
In the second half, George passed with surgical precision to Jenna who sliced the ball into the Tunbridge goal. Blackheath Vets had some palpitations, trying to keep up with Tunbridge Wells’ youthful forwards but they gave their coach a heart attack by missing an open goal. This shocked Blackheath back into action. Rachael sewed up the game, tucking away a beautiful placed strike from Jenny on a short corner. Tunbridge’s life support was switched off by Sarah MB’s magnificent saves including batting an aerial shot away with ease. Jenny decided to donate some blood by playing the ball with her chin. The ball was undented but Jenny's mouth was not.

Diagnosis: 3-0 win for Blackheath with fantastic medical support from Dr Merritt and Sue MB
Prescription: a straw for Jenny, train hard Monday and another win next Saturday!