It is a sad reflection of advancing age when 7 players one has coached at the age of 12 are established Veterans, but when they are joined by Lee Sandy one feels positively ancient!

Our Heroes of Past Endeavours took to the field at Holcombe for our Kent Veterans Cup-tie. Our Opponents – dismayed by this substantial array of talent – hastily persuaded Steve Haines to reinforce their ranks. Fortunately Steve had not forgotten his erstwhile Blackheath ties and it did not take him long to express his amusement at The Umpire’s pedantry thus earning himself a yellow card. Holcombe continued to express their amusement and bemusement at The Umpire’s efforts, resulting in reversed decisions; several losses of yardage; and a further yellow card. The Club’s behaviour was - as ever – impeccable!

We began with 15 minutes of frantic energy on the part of our hosts and a series of what Roser subsequently described as “senior moments” by BOE which had the touchline deeply concerned. Fortunately “The B” was in his finest Kellerian* “they shall not pass” mode and our ramparts remained unbreached. With informed, sideline, promptings from Rob Hughes and Holcombe remembering their age, gaps started to appear and The Club went into attack mode operating around the gently perambulating, central axis of Bailey and Couves which was rewarded by two net-testers from Ison. Holcombe managed to squeeze an PC past The Magnificent Golbey and we turned round 2-1 up.

The second-half opened brightly with Pat Gainey breaking the Ison goal-scoring monopoly with a timely third. BOE continued to dominate with Browner awakening memories of the late-lamented Peter Machin as he spurned the option of easy passes to unmarked colleagues in favour of a series of pirouettes that would have shamed a Torville-less Dean.

Holcombe closed the gap with another PC but this hint of their possible respite was swiftly snuffed out by two more Ison drag flick rockets that put us beyond reach. It was interesting to note that Mark scored 4 times without involving the backboard, with what AC somewhat unkindly referred to as “his lobs”. I must take issue with this as two of them were in the Michael Lawrence class – fortunately for BOE Mark Ison had decided to forego his golf.

Squad: David Golbey; Lee Sandy, Bartlett A, Andy ‘Roser’, Matt ‘Club Captain’ Wilde; Sgt Major Ison, Couves A, Ders Baillie, Maxi; Pat Gainey, Mr. Gilbert, Paul Whitney, Browner.

Touchline: Rob Hughes, JB, Daniel, Hector (Lysander had the day off)
Support Team: Colin & Sue Couves
MOTM: Andy B
DOD: Mingle - for bailing out

“You all did very well!”

* "they shall not pass" or "Ils ne passeront pas”. It was most famously used during the Battle of Verdun in World War I by French General Robert Nivelle, It was regularly quoted by Roy Keller of Keller Cup fame. Roy was a stalwart fullback for Blackheath and Kent and won an M.C. in the First World War long before Sir Ian 'Gandalf' McKellen spouted it in The Lord of the Rings movie.