HIGHWAYMEN EDGE A “TALE OF TWO RICKIES”

BOEHC Highwaymen 2 Burnt Ash Men’s 6s 1

So … the much vaunted makeover of the Club’s 6th team has at last taken place after months of deliberation, in part to reflect the fact that it was never truly a Vets’ team in a Vets’ league in the first place, and in part to not to put off new potential incumbents at the prospect of playing alongside aging ex-Broadmoor patients. So how about “Highwaymen” then? A bunch of outlawed, armed villains and muggers hanging around after dark on the heath lands of South London? … Mmmmm, plus ça change, but whatever – the team did have a distinctly youthful air about it for a change, thanks to the inclusion of no less than three debutant teenagers, all of which must have taken the overall average age of the squad down to somewhere vaguely below the 60 mark.

There was a slight sense of déjà vu about both the occasion and the opposition, as Burnt Ash had provided pre-season opposition for the previous two years, as well as league opposition during 2015-2016, so this was the fifth meeting between the two teams in exactly 24 months. Adding to the feeling of familiarity was the fact that on the same Saturday in 2015 Surrey were once again losing a one-day cricket final at Lords.

Certainly the defence had a familiar and solid look to it as well, based apparently on the mantra that size really does matter, as stalwarts Steve Miller and Phil Kinch were joined by the equally muscular Matt Southgate. As a collective they not only almost blocked out what little daylight was available on a murky early autumn afternoon, but also did a pretty good job in doing the same to the visitors’ attacking threat for most of the match. Keeper Keith Elliott was not overly troubled throughout and marshalled his defence well, despite at times struggling to spit out the team’s new three-syllable name in a coherent manner.

In terms of the team’s more youthful elements Max Nelson was not overawed by the fact that one of the Burnt Ash defenders had most probably consumed more substantial breakfasts than Max, and Harry Southgate showed some really nice touches and flicks too, not least of his fulsome locks of hair which drew some admiration from watching captain and Club corporate supremo Stephen Gilbert, who intimated that a sponsorship deal from Brylcreem might soon be in the offing if he ran about a bit more in the future. The pick of the bunch was, however, Josh Clark, who popped up everywhere across the pitch and was effective not only in attack, but also in tracking back and marking the opposition’s danger man, a task none of his midfield compatriots seemed overly keen to take on.

The experienced trio of Graham Green, playing with a rather misshapen thumb, Mark Ainley and Pat Gainey lent the team a sense of familiarity, but ultimately it was down to the two Rickies, Mssrs. Cornick and Cleall, to sway the game in the hosts favour, aided as ever by the tireless Ravi Wikramasuriya. The first goal after 15 minutes was a gem, as the ball was smashed out to the left by Wickramasuriya, played into the centre for Cleall to push a great ball into the D, which Cornick then picked up to beat the keeper. This should have been the launch-pad for great things, but a tendency to over-elaborate on the ball, not work hard enough off it and a chunk of early-season rust all contributed to keeping the game a bit too interesting in terms of potential outcomes. In the end it was down to a smash-and-grab piece of pick-pocketing by Richard Cleall as he somehow hurdled sticks and bodies, narrowly dodged the post and tucked the ball away for what turned out to be the winning goal.

In truth, the winning margin should have been a lot higher, and the team will have to be far more ruthless in the weeks ahead to either repeat the heroics of last season or justify their ferocious new “Highwaymen” moniker. Saturday was more a case of “Your money or your life ………. oh hang on, mate, don’t worry, have your wallet back, I’ve left the notes and only borrowed a bit of loose change, OK?” The team may have started like a train, but it also ended the game like one too, sadly with a “Southern” logo on the side of it, so everyone will need to keep on track for next week’s pre-season encounter at league rivals Sevenoaks.
But a win is a win, and the early signs are encouraging, as are the future opportunities for a myriad of Dick Turpin style jokes.

Team:
Keith Elliott (GK), Steve Miller, Tim Walters, Max Nelson, Phil Kinch, Ravi Wickramasuriya, Matt Southgate, Harry Southgate, Richard Cleall, Mark Ainley, Pat Gainey, Richard Cornick, Graham Green, Josh Clark, Tony D’Cruz and Stephen Gilbert (C).
Man-of-the-match:
Josh Clark – who not only seems to have grown about 5” since the end of last season, but who could prove to be a genuine asset to the Highwaymen’s armoury.
Umpires:
Jonny Coleman did a grand job, as did the visiting umpire from Burnt Ash. This local derby fixture can occasionally get a little feisty and loud, but the two officials ensured that this one most certainly did not.